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The Red Condom
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 #1
| May 8 2009, 17:17 | Quote: 
Right, so Beeegs and Huish's Birthday's are coming up, and we start study leave... well, now. So I decided to get the two of them some presents, which actually just turned out to be a couple of books, but I think they liked them...
Anyway, before I handed these over, I decided to do some 'joke' presents. Huish, being a bit of a Trek fan like me, was the proud receiver of a cardboard tricorder that I scrawled on in Sharpie marker. Beegs gift was a bit more thoughtful. Now he said a while ago he saw some 'Used' condoms on Amazon going for £0.01. Guess what I did. Now guess again, and don't be so disgusting! What I did was sacrificed two from my own stash and filled them with glue and white acrylic respectively. Then I put the articles in a box. I then presented them to him today at break. In the library. Bailey then threw the contents of the box at me and Huish, and we promply legged it. When we came up again 2 hours later, the box was still on the table and oe of the condoms was still on the floor. Huish cited it as "the most disgusting thing [I've] ever done..." Yup, maturity. And now I'm sodding off for the weekend to shoot things  Ta ta. |
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#2
| May 8 2009, 17:39 | Quote:
This is where I thank god that, as Scots, we're too stereotypical to buy each other many birthday presents.
 Poor Beagon! ----------------------- QUOTE (Tucker's Law) If some cunt can fuck something up that cunt will pick the worst possible time to fucking fuck it up because that cunt's a cunt. |
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#3
| May 8 2009, 17:52 | Quote:
Yes, it was a disturbing gift...
----------------------- Men hate me and women adore me - Ben Bailey
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#4
| May 8 2009, 18:34 | Quote:
I bet it's still there after study leave.
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#5
| May 8 2009, 19:25 | Quote:
I have actually had a used condom thrown in my face once... Not pleasant at all.
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#6
| May 8 2009, 20:12 | Quote:
Yeesh, that's harsh. But kind of funny, I guess. XD
You're off to shoot things? ----------------------- rayjt9@hotmail.co.uk
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#7
| May 9 2009, 08:11 | Quote:
I don't understand the title? Was it a communist condom?
----------------------- QUOTE It literally flew up, out of the water, and glasped its wings around me and suctioned on like the facehugger from Alien. It proceeded to flap and hump for about 40 seconds while I was simultaneously crying and dry-retching. During this, naturally, I tipped the bucket, encircling me with a shroud of disgusting slimy shit. Again, naturally, the other 5 stingrays notice this and fly up. I now have six stingrays swimming around me, occasionally suctioning on, nibbling, chewing, masticating as I scream infront of several groups of preschoolers 'OH MY FUCKING GOD GET ME THE FUCK OUT NOW' making the biggest scene ever. |
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#8
| May 9 2009, 11:06 | Quote:
Wow. I haven't got anyone a prsent for bloody ages, though I continually intend to.
-----------------------  QUOTE Führer Asad says: i offered to give him one Führer Asad says: and then he was like RAWR |
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#9
| May 9 2009, 11:09 | Quote:
QUOTE (dirty whore @ May 9 2009, 09:11)  I don't understand the title? Was it a communist condom? One had been painted to look disturbingly red and the other disturbingly white. |
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#10
| May 9 2009, 12:34 | Quote:
note to all: if ur condom turns red; something is wrong.
----------------------- QUOTE It literally flew up, out of the water, and glasped its wings around me and suctioned on like the facehugger from Alien. It proceeded to flap and hump for about 40 seconds while I was simultaneously crying and dry-retching. During this, naturally, I tipped the bucket, encircling me with a shroud of disgusting slimy shit. Again, naturally, the other 5 stingrays notice this and fly up. I now have six stingrays swimming around me, occasionally suctioning on, nibbling, chewing, masticating as I scream infront of several groups of preschoolers 'OH MY FUCKING GOD GET ME THE FUCK OUT NOW' making the biggest scene ever. |
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#11
| May 9 2009, 19:59 | Quote:
QUOTE (fucking slut bitch @ May 9 2009, 13:34) note to all: if ur condom turns red; something is wrong. I love this guy.  ----------------------- Men hate me and women adore me - Ben Bailey
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#12
| May 10 2009, 12:42 | Quote:
The red condom, or the blue condom? It's your choice.
----------------------- QUOTE Führer Asad says: i offered to give him one Führer Asad says: and then he was like RAWR |
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#13
| May 10 2009, 14:01 | Quote:
take the red condom and you wake up tomorrow morning remembering nothing, take the blue condom and you see how far the "rabbit hole" goes.
----------------------- Josh's way of telling the story is much better than mine:
QUOTE (Joshums @ Jun 30 2007, 11:46 PM) 12:15 - Toes proves himself supernatural: A rotating machine full of lighters stands in the Trocadero. Toes: Awesome! I'm having one of these. Josh: Ah, it's the kind of machine where you never win. It's not worth it. Toes: I won! Josh: wtf? |
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#14
| May 10 2009, 15:35 | Quote:
QUOTE (Mistletoes @ May 10 2009, 15:01) take the red condom and you wake up tomorrow morning remembering nothing, take the blue condom and you see how far the "rabbit hole" goes. it's the red pill, idiot. |
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#15
| May 10 2009, 20:01 | Quote:
Ah, humiliation.
----------------------- Men hate me and women adore me - Ben Bailey
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Time is now: 11/3/10, 06:13