Asad says (21:35):
tprs
i love you
i LOVE you
lobe
sexy sexy sexy
youte so goh5

Asad says (21:36):
uouve bot hte moves
to tunr m,e on
a d make m hard
i have an ecrwction rigt now
and want to wank with you
SEXY

Asad says (21:37):
lojucer
helo
?
maybe you cna come here yoo!
ocme o tlodnogn
il omfe and ouckoyu uo

A video of me doing what I love best

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHZS_6PcOgI

Random contact adds me, and comes up with this. I'm painfully aware this may be a bot, but I'm already mad, and this felt cathartic.

kelleyzatyhu@hotmail.com said:
Hi

Gerard- Reason is a wonderful thing, but we must be reasonable about it. says (22:10):
who is this?

kelleyzatyhu@hotmail.com says (22:12):
hey, A/S/L?

Gerard- Reason is a wonderful thing, but we must be reasonable about it. says (22:12):
ah, I'd like to know who /you/ are first
you added me
I want to know why

kelleyzatyhu@hotmail.com says (22:13):
hey whats up babe, U got a webcam? finally someone adds me, I am soo fuckin horny today for some reason lol

Gerard- Reason is a wonderful thing, but we must be reasonable about it. says (22:14):
No, no, I want to know who you are
I don't talk to strangers, so I'd like to know who you /are/

kelleyzatyhu@hotmail.com says (22:15):
listen hun, I am just about to start my webcam show with jen, come chat me there in my chat room? We can cyber, I will get naked if [I am a retard] you do..lol!

Gerard- Reason is a wonderful thing, but we must be reasonable about it. says (22:15):
...who ARE you?

kelleyzatyhu@hotmail.com says (22:17):
I can show [I am a retard] you how to watch if [I am a retard] you promise not to tell anyone else how to do it???PLEASE

Gerard- Reason is a wonderful thing, but we must be reasonable about it. says (22:18):
...are you listening?
Are you just trying to bait me?
Because I don't go in for that

kelleyzatyhu@hotmail.com says (22:21):
well since its the law that [I am a retard] you gotta be 18 (nudity involved), u have to sign up with a credit card for age verification! BUT.. Once you are inside, just clikc on "Webcams" let me know what name you use to sign in with so I know it is you babe! http://www.lovelocalgirls.com/jane2hot fill out the bottom of the page then fill out the next page as well and [I am a retard] you can see me live!

Gerard- Reason is a wonderful thing, but we must be reasonable about it. says (22:21):
HAHAHAAHAHAHA
Oh my God, Oh my God, how stupid do you think I am?
Do you think I sniff glue?
Do you think I'm some two bit retard with a room temperature IQ who just thuds his forehead against the keyboard in the hope of assembling a coherant sentence?
I'll give you credit for the whole attempt at appealing to sex, but I'm going to make this plain
I'm not retarded, and I'm not the kind of monsterous pervert who would go in for this shit, even if I were as thick as you think I am
now go fuck off and die in a hole.


*blocks*


Okay, the end felt good, even if it was likely a bot.

Because my parents are a way for TEN DAYS from then, ergo I have the house to myself.

Anyone feel like coming down and playing risk and mario kart?

Here’s a simple game for whenever you watch Doctor Who. You find some form of strong spirit, and take a drink every time one of the following happens:

David Tennant does an "Of course I've seen this all before" face.

Whenever either he or Jack appologise to a monster.

Whenever there's a really jarring reference to pop culture
If someone actually asks "Doctor who?"
If one of the assistants says something stupid/plot critical that makes the doctor realise something

Whenever Rose expresses jealousy.

If one of them makes a hammy death speech
Whenever Jack looks smug after shooting something.

Whenever someone questions the doctor's credentials or makes silent prayers to him

Every time someone makes a reference to Donna's inevitable demise.

Every gay kiss, every reference to a boy's boyfriend or a girl's girlfriend

any reference to one of the spin off shows

Every time the melty darleck says "the doctor is coming".

every time there is a case of deus ex machina

Every time he gets dewy-eyed over Gallifrey.


Thought up by me and sinead, with sinead giving the majority of suggestions. We're now opening it up to additional drinking opportunities

I won. I fucking won.

The most epic three time betrayal ever. me and Josh were at odds from the start, after he betrayed me for the upteenth time, only for a small contingent of my villagers to slip away, start again under a powerful ally, and move to avenge myself against him. Victory was mine, but only by the grace of a more powerful foe.

So in this game Josh and I were against each other from the start, I immediately allied with beegs however (who had also betrayed me, but he'd get his comeuppance). Josh took drew under his wings, and phil flapped about being gay. The die was thrown, and the expansion began.

The key difference in this game was just how offensive I was in establishing a forward base, at a choke point in the valley Josh found himself in. this later proved vital, as I set up a huge production line of war elephantas and cannon bombardiers, defended by a double wall and many towers. It was as the gates were being constructed that Josh chose to attack, not reckoning with the might of both my war elephants and mobile cannons. The battle was decided in that tight passage between the jungle and the river bank, his war wagons being torn to shreds beneath the tusks of my elephants. Clearly I had chosen my civilisation well, and having advanced my position, sent through the other units I had been breeding for just this purpose.

I was rolling thunder, death incarnate. No matter what Josh did, my elephants rolled through him, effortlessly ending the pathetic lives of the korean scum he commanded. It was a grisly battle, and my troops sustained heavy losses to the towers and castles he had scattered through his empire. No death was in vain though, the line held and my army broke into the very heart of his civilisation.

The end of a once mighty empire. Josh had indeed been great, but I realised that having defeated him single handedly, and never allowing him to push the charge back, I was even greater. My thoughts now turned to beegs, my one time ally. I made very clear my intention to "help" him defeat Hazel, while privately messaging Hazel to request his assistance in betraying Beegs. Beagon should have remembered now that I had sworn a vengeance on those who had betrayed me in the previous game, but either he was too trusting by half, or the inevitability of what was to come was known to him. My troops surrounded his own, all under the guise of preparing the war host that would assault Hazel. I even built a farm near him.

During this whole process my vanquished foe whispered nothings in my ear, reminding me of all beegs had done, and prophesying the razing of Beagonia. Whether he was trying to tempt me into the wholesale destruction of his one time allies, or trying to convince beegs to act, the end result was the same. In a flash of anger I ordered the attack, watching my elephants decimate his surrounded cataphracts and onagers, with no escape in sight. Hazel, trusting fool that he was, delivered his entire army into Beagon's base, foolishly keeping his back to me while I diverted a large portion of my army into his base. Beegs would not last long, with his troops gone and his base overrun, he too joined the wailing choir of vanquished foes that cast dire warning at Hazel.

I do not know why I turned my fury then on Hazel, but turn it I did, summarily smashing his forces while they had their backs turned. The elephants inside his base ravaged the castles and the few reserve troops, and once again the war machine began to rumble. This task was perhaps too much for my seasoned and battle weary veterans, the last of whom finally succumbed to the very dregs of Hazel's forces. By now however, a new war force was brewing within the unending farms of Toenailia, one of such unimaginable power and size that I was able to force a defeat from the Computer while simultaneously preparing a grand fleet to sale for the corner that Beegs and Hazel had ran to. I was indeed mighty then. In the face of such overwhelming power, my all but-defeated foes wrung their hands in despair, and resigned.


I am victorious.

They're officially cool again. You're a loser if you don't love milkshake bars.

And dean sherrings is a dick.

http://talks.cam.ac.uk/talk/index/11906

Guys guys, it's open to everyone and it's about RISK! (not the board game) Let's go let's go!

And after, I got accosted by the counter terrorist unit of the BTP. No shit, I left stevie and josh at the ticket barrier in King's Cross this morning and strode forward, ready to catch my train home. What followed is, I swear to God, true to the letter.

I walked through the ticket barrier, and a man in a high visibility jacket over a bulletproof vest asked me to come over. The jacket says "Counter Terrorism Active Super Mecha Death Man" or something. It had the words counter terrorism on it, and that's all I noticed. Now having complied with the request to join this man in the corner, he whips out his palm pilot computer thing along with the special screen pen, and tells me he's going to ask me a few questions.

shit.

First of all we go through the normal stuff, like name, age, home address, nationality, birthplace, phone number, favourite food etc. etc. He then asks where I'm going.
"Home."
"And where is that?"
"Camelot. It's on the line to cambridge."
"And why are you in London?"
"Visiting friends. I've been here the past three days."
*man furiously taps his screen with the pen in different places as if he's angry with it.*
"And do the police have records of you?"
"err..."

I really wasn't sure how honest to be. While it was technically true the armed police had once accosted me on suspicion of having a pump action shotgun, I wasn't arrested. On the other hand, they DID take my details down. The Police man sensed my indecision.

"Have you ever been arrested?"
"No! They only confiscated the gun and gave me a warning."
"... What gun?"

FUCK. FUCK FUCK.

A hasty explanation of why the armed police had my details later, the questioning resumed.

"And could you just open the bag please?"
*open bag. Inside the main pockets are a chess set, and school work*
"This is everything."
"Why do you have a chess set?"
"A friend was teaching me how to play."
"could you open up the chess set please?"
*I go to open up chess set. Pieces spill everywhere. Questioning resumes after a minute of picking them up*

"What's this?"
"It's a chemistry textbook."
*policeman continues to things out and check them.*
"Why do you have printouts on nuclear fission and a chemistry textbook?"
"It's for my work."
"WHAT WORK?"

Again, there was another awkward silence and me hurriedly explaining my chemistry coursework for school was on nuclear fission and fusion.

"Is there anything in your bag your shouldn't have?"
*thinks about USB stick, lighter, magnets, yu-gi-oh cards and holepunch in various pockets.*
"...nope."
"Then stay here while I take a description of you."

The funniest part came when at the end of questioning, the man spend ten minutes getting increasingly frustrated with his tiny computer for no apparent reason, until I noticed that something was issuing forth from beneath his jacket. As he went to tear out the piece of paper that had spontaneously appeared, I realised what it was.

HE HAD A FUCKING PRINTER STRAPPED TO HIS WAIST.

don't believe me about any of this?

The alphapathetics are a third wave techno ska-punk revival old skool House rape band which critics are hailing as UNAVAILABLE FOR REVIEW and BANNED IN AUSTRALIA.

Their album comes out on the 23rd of march.